THE LIST - continued

As my journey with the list has developed, the recipe has changed.  Below is the recipe that has brought about amazing success for those that have used it.

There is absolute value in the list of one-liners.  Brainstorm and write your list.  Get it all out there.  There may be several items that are similar and if so, group them because it will strengthen your next step.  

After grouping the like items.  Pick the top 10 most important items from the list.  This will assist when writing out your intention phrases.  Like any writing project, the first step of brainstorming and then second, organizing helps to develop your dream lover or partner.  

Before we go any further, there are a few little things that I feel need to be mentioned:

• Review your list for any negative words.  Do not use:  Not, No, Don't, etc..  Imagine the Universe has no negativity and ignores such words.  You may end up with the opposite of what you ask for...  
• Also, words like "potential" should be avoided at all costs.  We all have potential but that isn't a realized trait.  If you want success, ask for it and define what that means for you.  If you want marriage or commitment - spell it out.  
• If you want your lover to be of the opposite sex, be specific about that too.  Age, gender and race - if these are an issue for you, add them.  Be kind, be open, be specific.   We live in an abundant Universe and we can have all that we want in life but with people that we draw into our lives, we bring all of them in.  Be very specific and spend the time up front understanding your intentions.  
• Time...  there is no time constraints in the Universe either which I am sure others can logically debate and I would gladly defer to their statements; however, it has been my experience that often times, someone is already there and you just do not know it yet.   It does take time to get  the intention into the Universal Consciousness and I really don't know what that is but if you want it NOW, express it.  The affirmation process will help with this as it is in the present tense.  
• Be aware that you have no absolute control over anyone and free will always wins so make this about you and what you want.  Be open and know you, too, have free will.  The ability to be open and receive as well as well as reject.  More than one will likely receive your message.  More than one will likely present themselves.  It's your job to be discerning.  

So here goes...

Using the keys below to unlock the possibilities has changed my world and the world of those around me that have given this a try.  

• Affirmation;
• Feeling;
• Create the scenario for both parties - what he gets, what you get;
• Gratitude.

Affirmations are statements in the positive that are as if they are already true.  

Stating the feeling while using creative visualization can bring about an emotion.  Capture the emotion and express it. 

Describe what it is like for each of you and how the interaction benefits both parties.  

And with all things, being in a state of gratitude for all that is and will be.  This creates the openness and allowing and releases your intention to the higher powers or Universal Consciousness.  

Below is an example of how I used this technique.  

Dear Universe,

Thank you for the most amazingly kind and gentle man in my life.  He is sweet and attentive to my needs.  It feels amazing to be embraced with such love.  I adore him as much as he adores me and we both let one another know they are important, wanted and needed.  I know it is because of you and I thank you!  So it is.

Repeat for each item or groups of items on your list.  I am happy to assist with edits or clarifications. 

After you have your list; read and edit it until you are certain.  Once you are, place it someplace you can find if you need to do so in a pinch but not a place you look so often that you may obsess about it.  I generally place my list in my lingerie drawer and when I need to review it, it's right there with the things that make me feel sexy and attractive.  Seems fitting to me.  

More examples to follow!

Love and Light...   and I sure do want to hear about your successes!  I will share some, too!  

THE NEXT VINE IS WAITING FOR YOU

Everyone has a story.  Some are more comical; others more dramatic.  Whether good, bad, happy or sad we all have a past.  This past plays a part in who we are today yet is this who you want to be or the way you see your life should be?

This entry is for those that are feeling like life is lacking.  Maybe you are at crossroads with a life choice, in a stagnant relationship or simply unmotivated but not exactly certain why that is.

Different things hold us back from realizing our true and authentic selves yet that is where the pleasure in life resides, in my opinion.  Living in our own design, designed by self love and acceptance is a journey.  

The biggest inhibitor to our spiritual selves is conforming to meet the expectations of others and if you think about it, everyone has expectations of others in our society.  "Expectation" is an overused word, tossed around entirely too much and promotes entitlement by the ones that use it - at least, this is my new perspective and YES, guilty as charged.  Being from a Corporate environment, this word is used to the point of abuse and more likely why so many do not make it out of the workforce alive.  

Just the same, no matter the issue or the reason we have for where we find ourselves at times in our lives, if we are to analyze our situation, we may find we simply detoured.  It could be we fell in love, had children, accepted some role in life - possibly for survival.  

Many live in their past or relive their past repeatedly.  Some might say they have yet to learn their lesson and there is divinity in that too.  It could also be that there is an internal search for a missed opportunity.  Either way, it is not possible to gain momentum when you spend your life back tracking.  This is the surest way to finding yourself in a rut or living with regrets.

To gain momentum, create an intention and take action.  No matter how simple the first step is, take it.  Get your intention from your head to your heart and let it flow.  The Universe is here to support each and everyone of us in the most amazing of ways.  The art is in the way the Universe chooses to bring about our design.  It is important to note that we do not have a say in how things happen for us as much as the end result is the intended outcome.  Fear not, as the greater plan as I see it is a Universal Consciousness of collective thoughts and ideas created by each one of us.

We are all connected so it serves no one to hold on to the past for our lives are developing on a daily basis.  People are presented to us for various reasons of our asking and permitting.  We invite others into our lives with our intentions.  They stay as they intended.  When it's their time to go or our choice, we all have a duty to let go.  The duty is for them as well as for us.

**********************************

Some time ago now, I was having a lunch with a friend, that invited a new friend to join us while his old friend, also a friend of mine sat in the same place they had all frequented together previously.  As one might imagine the discomfort I might have felt.  The only barrier between all the glances back and forth between all three of them was me and a glass wall.

Most happy for the newly enchanted couple but feeling a bit displaced because I sensed behind me was someone that needed something else.  I had been there before, watching my old friend with an old friend, being new friends.  It was most unpleasant and uncomfortable but I sat through the pain and awkwardness of it and came out the other end a much better and loving person, friend and companion as a result.  Leaving the newly enchanted couple for a few minutes to chat with the old friend briefly was an unexpected move on my part but I could not resist the calling.  I am glad I took the few steps to spend a few talking to the old friend, that was sitting alone.

She was about to make a decision, or maybe she had but it had not yet quite sunk in at the moment.  Her life was about to take her on an amazing journey but she was still holding on to what had already departed, if only in a sense.  The amazing journey required not only letting go of what had already departed but everything she ever had acquired and worked for previously.  She was to leave the very place her roots had been firmly planted, leaving her friends and everything she coveted for a new experience but the fear of the unknown kept her holding on to the past.

For me, what I saw was that she had intended this new adventure in her minds eye and she could sense the excitement ahead but it required her to let go of her past to be able to move forward.  She is one of those that has the strength and endurance to handle such a change that many do not even try to conceive.  Yet, there she was, only one thing holding her back to her past was that vine.  All she had to do was catch the vine swinging her way and let go of the one she was on.  That is what I saw for her and we spoke a few minutes and then embraced before I walked back to the enchanted couple.

This entire situation was most healing for me and only the parties involved could possibly understand the dynamics of the experience.  Every time I feel myself back-tracking or making excuses not to move forward in life or love, I think back to the day I had lunch with my ex, his ex and his new love.  Seeing his ex-wife cling to a new vine and embrace a new life in another world was most empowering.  She is very glad she made the trip.  He and his new love, are the best of friends and I am so pleased to see him smile and light up like he does when the enchanted couple are together.  It's all he ever really wanted was an everlasting love, and it will be as intended.  As for me, I am simply head over heels in love with life!  

PERFECT AS IS...

It happens to all of us.  We judge others, they judge us, and then we pick ourselves apart, too.  Sure there is room for self-improvement.  Sure we will make mistakes.  Others will have their opinions of our actions, choices and so forth.  Who cares?  Well, of course we care.  Some of us care more that others and some of us care at times, but should we?

Hell NO!  That's what I say now!  Today, that is... tomorrow, I may forget temporarily but for the most part, I do believe:

Just this morning I was reading the news feed on FB and there it was... the "I am so not worthy because my last relationship failed".  I see this type of post over and over and I truly can empathize as I have had those same thoughts in the past.  Overcoming is another story; however.

Depending on the life situation, generally, failed relationships; I have found personal peace in finding myself.  The moment those clouds start to hover over me, or the moment I actually realize that the clouds are hovering (more realistic) I take a moment.  I stop.  I stop thinking about whatever it is, whomever it is and all the garbage we have a tendency to create in our own minds and redirect.  I redirect my thoughts to something that changes my energy.  The energy shift is most important and empowering thing you can do for yourself.  At least, that is how I choose to believe and it works.

When your energy is low it will attract more low.  When your vibration is high, the energy you attract is of a higher good.   It has taken me plenty of practice to learn to shift the energy but the reality of it is simply changing the thought which, quite honestly, is very basic and simple.  Maybe those posts on FB are really an attempt to glean support and empathy, or really to get help in shifting the energy or thought process.  At least, this is my guess based on the people in my network that make such posts.  They are amazing people that have had something defeating happen to them, just like I have.

Each and everyone of us come completely equipped to run our lives in a successful way.  We each have within us all we need to survive this crazy world we live in.  We each have the ability to change our directions and/or our paths.  We are cognitive and creative beings that are fallible and we simply lose touch with our authenticity and look outside of ourselves for answers.   Although collaboration is beneficial and often times helps us, it's the internal that is truest.  We are so ever complicated and tapping within eludes us much of the time.

Negative self-talk is one of the most harmful things we can do to ourselves.  What is wrong with being kind to yourself?  What is wrong with tapping into the innate and creating the most amazing dreamlike life for yourself?  What is wrong with being who you are today, as is, no pretending, let the world see you shine from the inside?  What is wrong with self-love and appreciation?  It is when we are in our divine that we can open up authentically and be the person we need to be which brings about all that we ever wanted, needed or desired.  All is perfect from the point of love; self-love.  And each one of us today have the ability to look within and love us for who we are, presently, today and accept that we are at our best when we are authentic.

From the authentic we can tap into what we need to do to move forward with our lives.

Sometimes, I have to remind myself:

No doubt I had my share of relationship drama and defeats.  Who hasn't?

I will never forget the day I had to be peeled off my sheets after being face down in a fit of tears and the people that held me up, and talked be through the pain until I could feel the warm sun glow on my face and laugh out loud, and eventually learning how to dance  in the rain.  I cherish the moments that I was completely lost but learned to embrace and celebrate the life I created as I climbed out of the deepest of depressions to find a world out there that accepts me as I am, far from perfect but perfectly happy.  And to those that don't like it.... all I have to say, is that is none of my concern!

EACH AND EVERY ONE OF US IS PERFECT AS IS and deserving of living a dream filled life!

To those that are hurting today, there are many more tomorrows under a rainbow of self-love waiting for you.  Get UP!  Your life is waiting for you....

As for everyone else; tell them to:  Mind your own biscuits and life will be gravy!  I love that Kasey Musgraves song called Biscuits!

THE LIST

A time has been presented for each one of us that a list was in order.   A list is a way to organize your thoughts, ideas and priorities.  A way to de-clutter the the brain or like I prefer to call it, a data dump.  With a list, it is easier to see what matters most and least; prioritizing.

There are many uses for lists and then it occurred to me during an esoteric workshop that if I can write a master list for my life, then why not a new lover?

In this workshop we are doing something like writing a list but mostly we were creating a sculpture while tapping into the minds eye about what we wanted in a dream lover.  As all the participants in the class were women, as one might suspect, it was a class for conjuring up a man!  

So there I was in this class with well known Astrologer, Marva Mason, teaching us about how to draw in to us what we each wanted in a man and how after the next full moon, or when our clay sculpture dissolved after we took him home and placed him in a bowl of water, our dream man would enter our lives.  

So my man was sculpted, lounging as if looking into the stars wondering where I was.  He was lying on his back with his arms folded and hands behind his head gazing upward.  This long and sexy legs were crossed in a leisurely way.  He was only wearing jeans and was built (again in my minds eye as I do not possess sculpting techniques)  in a way that could handle any physical feat thrown his way.  Then we had to carve words into our Prince Charming that reflected his qualities, the qualities we desired for our lover to have.  I don't recall the qualities for my Adonis but I do recall getting it and from there I decided to make a list for my ideal partner.  

A month later, my man had dissolved in a bowl of water and my list was drafted!  Four typed pages!  Single spaced; one-liners.  I listed everything I could imagine that I wanted in a partner.  I was very detailed on a few topics and wrote a paragraph on those topics that meant most to me at the tie.  I felt with complete certainty that the man I wrote about was coming into my life.  Guess what, he did!  Within 3-4 months, I had met my dream man for the first time and another month or so later, we connected and ultimately united.  It wasn't until later that I recalled my list I had put away and decided to go to read it, you know, just for grins and giggles.  

Upon reading my list I became a believer.  I wrote the type of jeans my man would wear, the color of his hair, his eyes, everything physical was in place.  I wrote about his family and how he interacted with them.  The fact he had children but they were grown, no longer living with him.  What he liked to do for fun, his hobbies and so forth... This man as far as I could see was the very man I conjured up.  I fell completely under the spell I created and so did he.  Sure enough, the deal was sealed, I received my gift from the Universe!

Upon our demise, I couldn't understand what could have possibly when wrong for us so I read the list again.  Let's just say you must be very specific with your list as the Universe has an amazing sense of humor and will bring about exactly what you ask for, to the iota, as in my case.  I learned that I included some ambiguous language.  

It took some soul searching before I would draft another list but I did and guess what?  The very same thing happened.  I created a shorter, more simplistic list and a more simplistic person entered my life and there was peace and harmony once more.  It was clear that I was completely in love with life until I wanted more.  More was not in the cards but I didn't specify that "more" had to be.  Again, my list, presented exactly what I asked for and it was amazing.  I learned yet another lesson about writing lists for love. 

After more reflection I realized that I had even dreamed a lover before and it had come to fruition and the more I thought about it, the more I realized I was bringing about what I thought about.  So I continued this practice.

The next list after much self-discovery brought another individual in my life.  Who the hell needs to do online dating (which is another story all together) when all you have to do is get a pad and pen and go to brainstorming?  Well, once more, and this time, I added a time frame and a final outcome.  Sure enough.  I didn't even have to go out, date or anything,  He came to me.  We had been acquainted but didn't know one another's status nor did we really see one another in the light that all of the sudden was now apparent.  It was absolutely crazy!  This happened fast and just the way I had drafted it to be.  I wrote 100 items on a list.  Some of these were shades of another and there were some things that were more important than others but 100 items and this man met the 95% mark of my dream man so he must be the one, right?  Well, what was the harm in the previous list of one-liners anyway, right?  We married 10/10/2010, which was my intended outcome (at least the intended outcome was to be married by the end of 2010 which was a challenge as it was already Spring when I did my list and I had yet to even meet or date my new man as of yet) and it was fast and furiously fun!  Seems the list really does work!  And it did but again we failed.  There was one vital element that I always overlooked on my list that I couldn't possibly live without.   The thing was I wasn't sure what it was exactly.  

Vowing not to create another list until I knew what I had been missing, I had met with a girl-friend over dinner one night.  She had been using my suggestions of a list and found her partner and was never more in love and I knew her partner first hand as he was a dear friend of mine that I had so much love and admiration.  In our talk, she mentioned "feeling".  She had to explain to be briefly her experience and suddenly, I understood.  

Feeling... Imagine that!  Yes!  That was the missing element...

“Some people are settling down, some people are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.” 

― Candace Bushnell, Sex and the City  

I gave this a great deal of thought and considered one additional aspect that was a take away from two other influences in my life; Crazy Mama from the Crazy Mama Celestial Emporium and my long term relationship councilor that claimed there was nothing wrong with me and I was not to return until I had a real problem to discuss,  This take away is an additional element, along with the feeling aspect, that has generated almost immediate results for myself and many others since with significant and powerful change in matters of the heart.

What I learned from my "experiments" was that I was looking for the qualities, values and morals that I possessed.  I wanted a like-minded individual or at least someone that I could be-friend and trust.  Someone that "got" me.  Someone accepting of me, mi vida loca and would enjoy embracing life in the same what that I did and wanted to continue doing.  I was listing for love but leaving out the "love" part of the list.  The part that gave the heart and soul the fuel to make it last.  Yet, I did know that once I did find what I ultimately wanted and needed, it would be ever-lasting.  Maybe, I just wasn't ready yet.  

To learn about those aspects, see my follow up posting on THE LIST.